Why am I so scared of getting older? That’s a question that has been taunting me for ages. I mean, I’m turning 23. Most of you reading this are probably doing the infamous eye-roll. But getting older is scary. No matter how old you are, everyone has these phases. And all I’m left with is uncertainty. I just don’t understand why this seriously is stressing me out.
I keep overthinking and analyzing why I’m so scared of something that’s so natural. Something that happens every day to someone out there. I mean, some might argue that I should be happy, glad even, that I’ve ‘survived’ yet another year in this society. But still, all I’m feeling right now is this deep feeling of anxiousness, wrapped around the ambiguousness of what the future holds.
From another perspective, getting older is kind of a good thing. You’ll be able to go places, travel with friends, meet your soul mate or whatever. It’s kind of like ‘hello! You’re an adult now?’
Maybe I just can’t leave the young ‘me’ behind (thanks science for not making time-traveling a thing now). Not being able to watch silly cartoons and eat cornflakes in the mornings. Transitioning into a real adult is kind of scary. Having to be dependent, working a job, paying bills, figuring out what taxes are for the first time. Let’s be honest here, being an adult is tough, and scary.
God, I do miss the good ol’ days.
However, I pictured my life that by 23; I would have experienced everything that I dreamed of when I was a kid. But today, writing this with only a few weeks away from the new year, I checked my list and found that I didn’t really do most of the stuff on my bucket list. Which was kind of like a slap in the face. I felt like my life is passing me by and I’m just standing there. But this stuff happens right? Life always gets in the way at the wrong times.
But growing up is inevitable. You and I need to understand that. It is going to happen anyway, and time isn’t really on our side in this battle. So if you’re like me, anxious about growing up and so, the remedy is to just manage your time wisely and try to make the best memories out of it. Just breathe and live in the moment. Like setting up your New Year resolutions (and actually doing them this time, read more here), and start with small goals until you reach the ultimate goal. By then, you’ll grow one year older, yet with more done and you’ll be looking at it from a brighter perspective.
If only I’d listen to my own writer’s voice. Things would be much simpler. Happy early birthday to me then?